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| Dad & His Girls! |
This was the eulogy I gave at his funeral, such an amazing attendance and heartwarming service.
Thank you all for coming, it is so great to see how many people Dad had an impact on and how many people are here for us to offer their love and support. The past few days my mom, sister and I have received so many heartfelt phone calls, voicemails, text messages, emails, facebook posts, visits, and hugs. This means so much to myself and my family, it has been you all that have helped us get through these past few days. There are some people that I would like to specifically recognize because I know my Dad would want all of you to know how much he cared for you and how much you meant to him.
First and most importantly I would like to say to my mom, thank you. You took the best care of dad each and every single day. You have shown Blair and I what it is like to truly care for a person and that finding a best friend in the one you love is the most important thing in a relationship. For the last 32 years, Big Daddy has been by your side and you have been by his. I want you to know that your girls are by your side always have been and always will be.
Pinky, Pete, Joel and Paxton, I am not sure if you knew how much you meant to Dad, but I can tell you right now, the four of you are what kept him going for as long as he did. I can honestly say that one, if not all of you were mentioned on a daily basis. He talked about all the crazy things you all did growing up and talked about your families as well. It got to the point where Blair and I would out of habit just ask him, so what is Pinky up to? What about Joel? He talked about you all so much. Pinky, I believe you were the last to see him. Last Saturday you all played golf together, his first time back out on the course since he broke his clavicle and messed up his shoulder. I want to thank you, his last day here was a good one. He was out on the course again with one of his best friend, it was a nice day and he got to swing one last time. So again, thank you all for giving my dad one more reason to hang on. Also to all of his friends from the gas company and other places, thank you. He had many friends and he cherished each and every one.
I would also like to recognize my sister. Blair, I cannot even begin to describe how proud you make me. Dad, mom and I are so proud of the young lady you have become. I cannot think of another 17 year old that has been through what you have been through these past few years. I was lucky enough to have dad healthy throughout my high school years, his health has been on a steady decline since you began high school. And these last 4 years you have been nothing but supportive, selfless, helpful, the list goes on. But most importantly, you never once complained and you always did everything with a smile. Dad was our best friend and it is going to be rough, but know that we will get through this together.
Pam Griffith, my dad has always thought of you as a sister. You were there for him regardless of the situation. The nights when he would wake up with a low blood sugar and mom would call you, you were there, almost faster than the rescue squad. You would do anything for our family and we all appreciate that beyond words. Thank you for everything, we could not do it without you.
Pam Santimore, another important person in Dad’s life. You were the only one that I knew that could give dad a run for his money when it came to witty remarks and quick comebacks, I loved it! You have always been there when any of us have needed you, you are there in a heart beat no matter what you are doing. We cannot thank you enough for all that you did for dad over the years and all that you have done for us.
Jerry, I know dad was thrilled to have you as a part of the family, finally a dude to hang out with! After 20 years of nothing but women, you added some testosterone at our Sunday dinners. You have been there for my dad and have been a great friend to him and to all of us. Thank you for your willingness to help with whatever he or any of us needed.
Pap, I know Dad appreciated all that you have done for dad, mom, and us girls. You were dad’s company during the day and even though you may have turned Dad’s dog, Ace, against him, he loved ya! You are the man of the house now so you better start lifting those weights again!
Bubby, Mike and Skip, your trips to the house throughout the week gave dad something to look forward to. He thought very highly of all of you. Thanks for being there for anything he needed.
His brother, Steve, and his niece and nephew, Madeline and Miles, thank you for being there for him. Steve, your close relationship with my dad meant a lot to him. Miles and Madeline, I don’t know how many times I thought to myself, “how do these two know more about my dad’s reef tank than I do!” So thank you guys, you always made dad smile.
Phillip, you will always hold a special place in our family’s heart. My dad cared a lot about you and thought very highly of you. You have been there for us in so many different circumstances, you have been such a great friend to Blair and I cannot thank you enough for that. And by the way, I know this is probably is not the best time to mention this, but, I know you were planning to HELP Dad make his famous pulled pork BBQ for Blair’s grad party, but looks like you’re the main squeeze dude. I know my dad would pick you over me in the kitchen any day.
Melissa, or as my dad would say, “Mel-Dona”. You also have been a part of our family for a long time, when I read what you wrote in one of your papers last night, about Blair and my Dad and your admiration for Blair, it brought tears to my eyes. I mean REALLY Melissa, as if I hadn’t been crying enough! J You truly are an amazing girl and a great friend.
Kelly and Justin, I cannot thank you enough for being by my mom, sisters, and my side 24-7 this week. The two of you helped get us all through the week. Kelly you were able to do something I could not do this week, you put a smile on Mama J’s face, and not just any smile, one of her big Hardbower smiles! You two even came to get pedicures with us girls, you know my dad was looking down laughing about that one, but you did it because you knew that it would make us happy. Thank you both for everything.
To all of our neighbors, thank you for everything this week.
To the DESC family, thank you for all the emails, cards, and on-going support.
Dad was our best friend, biggest fan and most importantly our heart. The relationship Blair and I share with Dad is a special one. He has always been such an awesome person and so much fun. He could make us laugh like no one else could and was always making our friends laugh. There was just something about him that made everyone like him.
We grew up listening to Metallica, Creed, Guns and Roses, Pink Floyd, Jimi Hendrix, you know, all the cool music! Dad would rock out in the car, singing the words (well trying to sing the words!) to every song playing on 99.1 HFS or DC101, myself in the front seat, Blair in the back… top down, music blasting…yep, you guessed it, we thought we were total bad asses. My dad left the house, we wanted to go, just so we could get in the car and blast the music. Now when mom came along, I got stuck in the back seat…which wasn’t as cool, but I still felt cooler than everyone else!
Somehow anything we did with dad made us feel that way, we shared excitement in all the things he did. When he got his Harley Davidson, I remember bragging to all my friends that my dad was a “biker”. He would ride his bike to my soccer games and I remember hearing him come up the road. I remember the butterflies I got in my stomach. In my head I would think, “yeah, that’s my dad, I know you are jealous!”
Everything we did, we wanted mom and dad to be a part of. Some of the best nights and most memorable ones are those we spent kickin’ it on the back patio with a few friends, some cold beers, and the company of mom and dad. Dad would always be the center of conversation, with an ability to socialize with anyone and just a funny personality. My friends loved him and I know that meant a lot to him.
The only thing giving us comfort at this moment is the fact that we know he will no longer suffer from the pain he fought through every single minute of every single day these past few years. He did his best to hang on for us girls, we saw him everyday fight off the pain just to be around a little while longer. He knew it was his time to go and he was taken from us in the way that he always said he wanted.
He didn’t suffer. He was outside in the warm air, the sun was shining, the grass was green and the sky was the brightest blue that Sunday morning. Like his girls, Dad loved that summer air, the sound of birds chirping and that warm feeling of sunshine. This time last year I was set on the idea of finding him and me a place on the beach so he could enjoy the ocean. Dad, I know you are enjoying the ocean. You are able to play golf without having to worry about the pain, you can ride that Harley and sit out on the beach and feel the sand beneath your toes. Yeah We know, We know, you are livin’ it up and We are totally jealous.
You know for a fact Blair and I would much rather be on the coast of somewhere beautiful than stuck here in Virginia, don’t rub it in!
But Dad, you deserve it. Live it up and save us a spot right next to ya.
